I should just rename this blog "Pictures of Sam"

Quick hello to let you know that we are alive, though buried under nearly 3 feet of snow. I would provide a picture, but it's too cold outside. Maybe later I'll venture out when Sam takes a nap.

So, no pictures of the blizzard, but of course I have pictures of Sam...the most photographed baby on the planet. Sean Preston look out!



Big news is Sam is starting to raise his head, and keeping it up for a good 5 seconds. Oh, the things I am impressed by. Every day he takes another little baby step out of floppy blob stage into master of flailing appendages.



I am waiting for the plumbers to come by. I don't know if I mentioned it, but when my mom came to visit a while back we actually lost heat. They replaced some sort of circulation thingy and it was all fixed. Only now when the furnace/boiler fires up it goes BOOM! and shakes the whole house. Kinda scary. But plumber man is coming to save the day, and make the dog bark and wake Sam from his nap.

Sam is not too pleased sitting here with me in the sling...Move woman! Move! I do not sit, I am a man of motion! So here are a few of my favorite pics of recent before I go and walk, around the house, in circles...fun.

You BAD Mama!

This morning I had to hold down my little boys arms while they poked him with needles. The worst part was that he was all smiles and coos, then OOOOWWWWwwww. Sam cried. I cried. No fun at all.

I won't get into the whole vaccine thing, but it was difficult. The shots he got had no themerisol involved, which was my primary concern. But of course, side effects are possible, and there's a whole bunch of scary theories out there. Makes me worry. It's hard to know whether you make the right decisions. I'm not sure I informed myself as much as I could have, so in the end, I deferred to the doctor...who I trust. And after all, you never know when he might decide to take a romp in Amish country. But everyone has their own bias and perspective and I feel I should explore my own a little more. There will be more opportunities for that in the future...unfortunately.

Um, an upside? Well, Sam got his first taste of really sweet. The childrens Tylenol (his legs are really sore) is cherry flavored. I tasted it first. Yum. He seemed to enjoy it too.

Today Sam is 2 months old! At the doctor he weighed 14 lbs 1.5oz and is 24.5 inches long. He's a big boy. 90th percentile. Whoa. How did that happen? Virginia Tech offensive line here we come! Right. As if. I cry when the doctor gives the kid a shot, like I'm going to encourage him to be knocked about the head by large, aggressive boys. So instead of being on the team, perhaps he'll be the guy carrying the keg to the tailgate..though I'm not sure that's a good idea either.



Sunday we had the reunion of our birthing class, which was great. Cool to see all the little ones. Crazy to think we've all been in the same room before, just the babes were on the inside instead of the outside. We hope to do it again. It's good to keep in touch with other mamas, and the dads too. Sam was, of course, huge compared to the rest. I should get one of those T shirts that say "My baby can kick your baby's ass"...just for laughs of course! Sam is a gentle giant.

Our new box

Last night was the Super Bowl. We "watched" it. Meaning we stood in the kitchen cooking pizza and wings over a glass of wine while it was playing in the other room. What we saw of it was a good game. Too bad Chicago's quarterback Glennon, oops, I mean Grossman couldn't throw to his own players. In the end, I didn't really care who won. Whenever it got boring or there was a stoppage, we switched over to the Puppy Bowl on animal planet. Man, that's entertainment. I did enjoy Prince, though his medley of songs was kinda a head scratcher...was there some underlying theme I didn't put together? Let's Go Crazy, Proud Mary, All Along the Watchtower...and a few other mixed in. But I'm pretty sure he ended with Foo Fighters. Foo Fighters? Someone enlighten me please.

We have some news! Other than Sam entering his "grumpy" phase that is. We're buying a house! It's an ugly little thing, but in a great neighborhood. It should turn out to be a good investment. It's going to be hard moving from this big old victorian into a 900 square foot box, but it will be ourbox. Our ugly box...see:



but the plan is to make it look like this!



Should only take us a few years. :-)

Crap. Well I had planned to do a longer post, but Sam has awoken and is beckoning his servant. So here's some pics of the DingDong...8 weeks old! Wow, time is flying.

Go Hokie...Basketball?!

I never really followed college basketball. Perhaps occasionally participating in sweet sixteen bracket polls, but without any clue of who is good or bad. Just randomly advancing one team or another based on rankings. I, unlike J (and most men, I think) need an emotional investment to enjoy watching sports. I need to want someone to win. So if a team I love isn't playing, or if they are not directly effected by the outcome (or if I don't have money riding on it) I don't watch. That's why college basketball has never made it onto my TV schedule. I could really give a crap about basketball dynasties the likes of Duke and UNC. That is, unless...

The Hokies are kicking their asses!

Um, wha?


Ok, looks like I'll have to bone up on some hoops knowledge. And tonight they play FSU! And I HATE me some Seminoles! God, with their lame tomahawk chop accompanied by what can only be described as the most annoying chant/song thingy in college sports? Emotional investment? Check! Yay, my winter Hokie drought may just be over. And I need a little Hokie love after...well, you know.

Dreaming of pooping...while probably pooping

I've seen enough America's Funniest Home Videos to expect a little pee to come my way. After all, while changing a diaper it's like having a gun of urine pointed directly at your forehead. This gun has, of course, gone off. Numerous times. As a result, if I'm remiss in having something to cover the weapon "just in case", I rush through the drill, diaper ointment be damned! You never know whether Sam is holding one in the chamber or not.

I've accepted my new life and the new threat of pee being launched at my face. It's a part of the joy of motherhood. But last night was a new experience. Explosive poo. I'm sure he's had these butt explosions before, but well within the confines of a diaper. This time it was during the high risk diaper change time...at 2AM...on the bed...more specifically, on the sheets where I sleep. Ick.

So today there is some extra laundry to do.

Other than being spattered by liquid poo in the middle of the night, things have been pretty good. I thought Sam was getting on a schedule, but then he decided that 2AM - 6AM was party time on Sunday night...I'm still recovering. Today has been good and I have been endulging in Sam's new trick...smiling! He's so cute! I can't wait for the giggles to come, but for now, the little grin with happy crinkled eyes is a treat. Makes the poop party worth it...

The prince is currently sleeping and thought I'd better write a little here instead of one of the million other things I should be doing ...specifically, writing Thank You cards. J and I were blessed with many cute and thoughtful gifts upon Sams birth. All that the universe asks of us for having such generous friends and family is the simple task of writing Thank You cards. No problem, right? Ugh. One or two...or even five, no biggee. But I think we're up to 14. I'm lucky if I get to eat lunch. When will I write thank you cards? I don't want to sound ungrateful, but I hope everyone understands when they don't get their recognition until spring. Perhaps summer.

Tonight we're going to Trivia! Sam made his debut last week and did great. He slep the entire time. Things are shaping up pretty good for a repeat performance. Right now is his first nap since this morning...so if he wakes up around 4:30 and stays up until 7ish we should be good! If he doesn't stay asleep, we'll just bail early. Wish us luck. Go Fredward!

Glennon, count your lucky stars...

he can't drive, or walk, or crawl...because "The Claw" has your name on it.
.

Here's to hoping for a Happy Hokie New Year.

I can't walk, but I can still look good...

Finally, here are some pics of Sam in his new kicks, lovingly provided by his Aunt PDiddy

Here he is, bustin' a move...don't worry, that face is just him being hardcore.

Wee little shoes...so cute.

Worn out from kickin' it.

Thanks Aunt Pam!

We're heading out tomorrow to J's folks for a week of xmas cheer. I'm SO looking forward to it. Hope everyone has a good holiday and great New Year...if I don't post before then...GO HOKIES!!

I am in line at the post office, Sam pleasantly asleep in his infant carrier at my feet. The lady behind me, very nicely asks how old he is, and we began to chat. And boy, this lady likes to talk. She has this annoying passive-aggressive way of giving me parenting advice, without really giving me advice, you know? It is all very nice and polite, but with all sorts of assumptions that I am an idiot and, man, she won't stop talking. I fidget with my bag of presents and look disparingly at the line of fellow procrastinators in front of me. Sam stirs. I joke how the line better move because he is due to awaken at any moment, explaining how I burned an hour of precious sleeping-baby-time getting my shit together and getting out the door...

"Well, you'll be quicker once you get organized."

"Yep"

"You'll find that once they get older, they can even help themselves"

"Yep"

"You see, you have to set up areas for them to put their things, like shoes, and beach gear, that way, everyone can find their things."

"Yep."

Wait. Hold on. Beach gear? Um, I'm pretty sure this lady is giving me advice she gleened off of last night's episode of Supernanny. I think of calling her out, but I don't. Luckily the line starts to move. I realize that being a new mother has brought out new things in me...like the ability to be irritated by well-meaning but annoying older women. Oh, also, ROAD RAGE. I have no tolerance for idiot drivers when Sam is in the car. Or when he's not, because after all, he could be in the car. Not waiting your turn at a 4-way stop has become a capital offence in my book.

This less than pleasant attitude may have something to do with the season. Xmas is kicking my ass. Shopping, mailing crap, packing up baby stuff, gathering the dogs stuff, paying $28 to ship presents Express because there is no Priority slips anywhere and Sam threatening to awaken in full "Give me the boob!" frenzy...bah hum bug. I can't wait until we arrive in Connecticut at J's folks and can relax.

So, Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to everyone. I hope all your presents have been shipped and that Santa is kind to you. I am hoping in the new year I may be able to sit down at the computer a little more often and share what is going on...but Sam is in charge now, so I'll have to run it by him.

what a babe

I've been trying to work on writing out Sam's "birth story", but of course it's a little busy around here. Especially since Grandma and Grandpa left yesterday. We are blessed to have such loving support. Luckily Sam has finally figured out that night time is for sleeping, so the past few nights have been more restful than the previous, which gives me more time to get some things in order. He's sleeping now so I thought I could finish up the story, but boy, a lot happened. It's going to be a novel! But I want to be sure to get it all down while it's still fresh. Hopefully one day soon I'll finish it.

In the meantime, here's something from my first baby photo shoot yesterday. As you can see, I'm not the only one who appreciates the virtues of the Snoogle.

SAM!!!

I am super excited to announce the birth of Samuel Frederic! Born Wednesday 3:02 AM via c-section he weighed 9 pounds, 10 ounces and is 23 inches long.

Thanks to everyone for the kind wishes and for checking up on us. We just got out of the hopsital yesterday and will be resting up for a few days. I'll be back soon to share all the details and more pictures that you could ever want. Sam is truly a blessing.

The. Cutest. Thing. EVER.

All the cliches are true. I have never loved anything so much.

MY WATER BROKE!!!

Ok, off to take a shower and we're headed to the hospital!!! They want to check out the baby. If things are slow, they're going to send me home for a while, but hopefully things will go quickly. Baby boy is coming!

Wish us luck!!!

If only I could put my cervix on the window sill...it works with tomatoes

If you can believe it, no change.

So, new game plan. We are going in for another NST tonight and as long as everything is ok, they are going to "ripen my cervix" with some sort of gel. Then they will do it again tomorrow. If no labor begins between now and Thursday, then I am being induced on Thursday.

I'd be lying if I didn't say I am disappointed with my body. She's not doing what I need her to do. But I am glad to know there is an end in sight. I don't like it that he's held up in there, shut up so tight. I know he's doing ok now, so I would prefer to just get him out of there now. The increased risks of c-section doesn't bother me. After all, it's more about him than me. I can take surgery and a longer recovery if it means he gets out healthy. Not that he's is trouble. It's just I can't help but worry that the reason this isn't progressing quicker is because of me, not him. That he's ready, or rather, has BEEN ready, but my body is just not interested.

So that's the scoop.

Baby by the weekend!

41 weeks! Bah.

Thought something might have been happening yesterday, but of course it stopped. Even thought my water might have broke, but baby just squeezed my bladder a bit. Sorry if that's a little TMI.

I'm losing my good spirits. Getting grumpy and a little worried. I know I shouldn't be worried, but you can't help it. I just want my healthy little boy in my arms...NOW.

Tomorrow I have a doctor's appointment. Hopefully there will be progress.

All systems go. Did you hear me? GO!

The tests show that everything is just honky dory in there. Getting plenty of oxygen, enough water in the pool to splash around and, most importantly, his right ear is perfect!



During the fluid check ultrasound we asked for a pic, but since it's so crowded and his back is to the front of me this was the only recognizable body part he could capture. Definitely takes after his father, no?

So the next step is...well, what it's been for the last week. Wait. I have an appointment on Monday, but we're hoping in won't be needed. Contractions are still happening, but nothing mind blowing. I'm sure anyone out there who reads this is as anxious as we are, so maybe I'll shut up about it. Contractions that, cramping this, I'm huge, wah wah wah...

So, in other news? Hmmm.

The mice who live in our house will poop in the silverware drawer, where there is NO FOOD, but won't touch the cheese in the traps we set up. Damn if I can't hear them right now in the kitchen scurrying around! Little monsters. I never had a big problem with critters before, but I think since baby is coming I've taken a harder line on vermin pooping near my food. Sorry guys. Well, not yet since you're not smooshed. But I will be sorry...I think we'll both be sorry. Part of me hopes they realize how dangerous the neighborhood just got and move out. The same part of me that thinks that the Secret of Nihm is plausible.

Oh, and it's going to snow. Tonight and some tomorrow too. Perhaps babe just wanted to wait for it to be pretty and white to come into the world? Or he is diabolical, and is waiting until driving and flying conditions are at their most treacherous...

Bustin' at the seams

Ok, this kid is getting evicted. Not only am I HUGE (I know. I've been saying that for 9 months now, but now it's really, really true) but I got my first stretch marks! Crap. I've been counting my genetic blessings that I've avoided them, and if this kid had a sense of timing I would have escaped them altogether. I'm trying to look at them as badges of honor, and though I'd be happy to have none,mothers have been gladly sacrificing their bodies since the beginning of time, so I should stop my whining. I've got it pretty good. They aren't on my belly (yet) but on my hips, where I already have some from puberty.

Doctor checked me yesterday...no change. Not dialated, not even a smidge. I have a NST on Friday were they check to make sure baby is chillin' ok, that his sense of timing is better than theirs. In the end, he knows best. I might let them do a membrane sweeep on Monday if something doesn't happen over the weekend. That's when they kinda poke at your amniotic sac to stimulate hormones and hopefully get the ball rolling a little...I know you're jealous, sounds like fun, huh?

So, is my November baby destined to be a December baby? We shall see!

J and I both have a weird feeling about Saturday.

First Notice: Past Due

Well, STILL pregnant. Baby Boy's due date has come and gone. Though the doctor told me 41-42 weeks is not unusual I must admit I was holding on to that day. I figured the little guy would be enjoying his first Hokie football game on the couch with us, but instead he got the usual muffled Daddy screams through my abdomen wall. Perhaps his first words won't be "Tubbs, shut up!" but "GLENNON! You idiot!" Of course it all turned out ok on Saturday. Since we couldn't have Baby, at least we got to retain the Commonwealth Cup! Yay Hokies!

Last night I had some contractions, but at this point I don't put a lot of stock in that. I know I'm getting closer, but to guess how close that may be seems futile. It will happen when it happens. Only it is getting awfully close to xmas! I would like to keep him a November Baby. For some reason that line between months offers some kind of mental buffer. Expenditures on presents is a worry...especially before the winter heating season in Vermont. Baby Bday + Xmas + Gas Bills = poor house.

So I'm just waiting. I'm a little annoyed that the pre-baby house cleaning and grocery store trip has faded in their effectiveness. The dog hair is accumulating and the fridge is becoming bare. Today I have a list of little tasks to complete. Maybe the activity will help move things along.

So until further notice, I am still cookin' the kid. Everyone send me some labor vibes!

Cookin'

So, no change. Same ol' situation. She told me I should start thinking about it being 41 weeks so I don't drive myself crazy. I don't WANT it to take 41 weeks! **whiny voice and stamping feet**

A 41 week baby MUST be bigger than a 40 week baby. And I don't want that if I can help it, considering where he has to squeeze through. And I know for sure a 41 week pregnant butt will be bigger, and my butt is as about as big as I can stand. Come on kid...get a move on!

However, if you are a superstitious type, perhaps he will come on Saturday. J's dad had a collegue call him from a casino and ask him if he wanted to place a bet. He said put $10 on 25 at the roulette table since it's Fredwards due date...and it hit! Woo hoo! Not exactly scientific, but a girl can hope.

So it's just the waiting game around here. Looks like it will just be the two of us for turkey day. We are not inundated with turkey as I had feared we might. J forgot to sign up for the free turkey at work, so it's just the one bird. Still alot for two people, but lord knows I won't feel like cooking much after the kid shows up so the leftovers will be a blessing. And I made 2 pies! A pumpkin pie (which is already half gone) and a cherry pie that is waiting for Thursday in the fridge, yum! Of course none of this is going to help my butt situation, but let's just hope breastfeeding goes really well and the kid will just suck the fat off of me? It can happen, so I've heard. I've also heard not to count on it.

But then, there's always this

Still here, still pregnant

I've been hiding out a bit around here. I'm not laying low just on the blog front, but my phone communications have been few and brief. I think it's because there is this big thing that will be happening and everything else just seems boring and not worth mentioning. Also, most of my recent experiences are best described with whining. And I don't want to whine too much. So to all my buds out there, sorry I haven't been in touch very often...soon I will have news. Very soon I hope.

Especially Mrs. T! I don't think I've mentioned it in a blog post, but Mrs. T is pregnant too!! She's going to be having a little girl in April and I am so excited we are going through this major life change at the same time. Though being a bit further ahead makes me feel a little remiss in my friend duties, as she deserves all the care and attention she blessed me with when it all began for me. Oh I can't wait for our kids to meet! I can imagine them great friends. That is until cootie age. Then they'll ignore each other, until about 13 or 14...then we'll HOPE they ignore each other.

Hey, Mrs. T! if you read this...I remember you asking about how to post a picture. What's the the story? Am I going to get to see a pic of this little girl or not?!

I can't let this blog post go without a little bit of a whine. I hurt. Every joint in my body hurts. I feel like I've been hit by a bus. The worst part is, I can do nothing. I just sit. I feel useless.

Ok, now on the upside! My turkey points didn't have to be used to buy a turkey! Figures since such a large portion of the population is vegetarian. It's just $20 off your bill. Yeah! So yesterday I got some pie fixins and stocked up on some other crap. During the process I realized I can no longer go to the store to shop. My pregnant "waddle" has turned into a pregnant "shuffle" since my joints hurt so much. I felt like I was using the shopping cart as a walker. I must have looked pretty pathetic...also REALLY pregnant. 3 people asked me when I was due...usually they don't. I think they were just trying to insure that my grimaces and groans weren't indications of labor. Ooops, I let that go back into the whining realm...sorry.

Oh, HAPPY BIRTHDAY AMY! Today is my SIL bday. Yeah! You know what would be a GREAT present? A NEPHEW! I'll see what I can do.

Know any good turkey recipes?

Yesterday was the big "before baby" shopping trip to the grocery store. It took 3 hours. Not 3 hours just in the store (thank god), but 3 hours to waddle in, waddle around and waddle out. A good portion of that was also unloading the car and putting everything away.

Then I took a 2 hour nap.

It's frustrating that things that used to be simple have become major endeavors. I suppose it's a primer for what is to come...they say to add an hour to every task when you have baby with you. At least then I'll have baby in a little carrier on the front of the cart instead of grinding his head into my cervix as I walk.

One of my goals with the shopping trip was to get a turkey! I've been collecting "Turkey Points" from our grocery receipts, but I didn't have enough for the trip yesterday. I decided I better get a turkey anyway, since I wasn't sure the next time I would be able to get to the store. And because I want to get that sucker cooked, carved and in the freezer before my water breaks. Well, of course my grocery bill was absurdly high with all the frozen and canned foods and low stress meals, and as a result I earned a ton of turkey points. Doing the math in my head I knew I was close, when added with my points at home, to get a free turkey. I toyed with the idea of returning the turkey I got and trying to redeem points another day. But then you have to account for the reduced grocery bill and perhaps the docking of points...and I started to get a head ache. I didn't want to deal, so I bought my Butterball. Well, I got home and we do indeed have enough points for a free turkey. So now we can have two turkeys! The one I already have isn't real big, and if baby comes before Thanksgiving, there's a good chance of alot of people being around, so another turkey isn't really a bad thing...

Then J came home last night and when poking around the fridge I hear "So you got a turkey?"

"Yeah, funny story" I reply.

"Well, I got an email at work...everyone gets a free turkey and a pie...so I guess we'll have a lot of turkey."

Um, you think?

I don't have enough room in our fridge for 3 turkeys. Especially when you take into account the stockpile of Lean Cuisine and Amy's Lasagna. I'm assuming there is a charity somewhere in town that will take one... or perhaps my MIL can use one at xmas?

Otherwise, it's turkey until Valentines Day in our house.

Taking a deep, cleansing bitch

I don't know if I've mentioned it before, but my landlord is having our house painted. Just the exterior, so it's not as intrusive as it could be. At first, it was bad, as they were scraping all the old paint off at 7AM every morning, but once they started the actual painting it got better. Just a little clattering of ladders now and then.

I don't know if it's my hormones, discomfort or the fact that it is TAKING THEM FOREVER, but lately, they are being HUGE pains in the ass. If I go out, I come back and they are parked in the driveway (we only have one spot). They make the dog bark. Ok, I can't really blame them for that...it's not like they're trying to make him bark, but Tubbs is driving me absolutely bonkers. As a result, baby is getting a steady stream of yelling, which is making me feel bad, and puts me in even a worse mood. Baby's first words will be "Tubbs, shut up!"

Now, the straw the broke the pregnant lady's back...

They are currently at lunch. This lunch is usually 2 hours long...I don't really care about that, they don't work for me. But what I DO care about is that they have left all their uncovered paint cans and brushes in Tubb's area. So he can't go outside. Of course I realize this as I'm walking him out to his chain, hunched over as I have him by the collar...and after he stepped on the newly painted threshold! Why would you paint a piece of wood that marks the entrance and exit of a house without telling the people inside?! Tubbs now has a green foot...and the threshold has a large paw print on it. I don't even want to get into how with my 8 month pregnant body I tried to coax the 90 pound dog away from his outside toilet shangri-la and back inside, without either of us stepping on the threshold again, and put his leash on so we can go to a non-paint can filled area to pee.

I think my neighbors have a new opinion of me, as I let the expletives fly. Wonder how many cute belly comments I'll get now.

And on our way in, I saw they are putting trash in my recycle bin!!! AAAAAArrrrrgghhh!

Tubbs is licking his foot. Great, now he'll be poisoned.

Hokies, Herbie and Hormones

Last Thursdsay night was either going to be a chance for redemption, or a nail in the coffin of our season. Most weren't too optimistic. I cringed as I heard Herbie declare Clemson as the best One Loss Team in the NCAA. Kirk's comments from the BC game were fresh in my mind. I still felt the sting of his disapproval and disappointment. But now, well, we've kissed and made up...



As the night went on, I cheered along with the VT faithful as Herbie lavished his praise on the Hokie porgram, particularly Bud Foster. I haven't enjoyed a football game that much in a long time. Congrats Hokies! (Smoooooch Herbie)

All I needed for a perfect weekend was for Miami to beat GT. Bah. I didn't get to watch this game because of another discrepancy between what is shown as BLACKOUT on ESPN map and what is actually blacked out. But watching the bottom line, I had hope... and then the 'Canes blew it. Blew it big time. God I hope we crush them on Saturday.

Due to the ESPN problem, I called Adelphia again hoping to at least get my money back for this week of Gameplan. Well, to my surprise they agreed to refund the whole season! What does this mean? It means they are liars. Either they lied when they previously told me it was IMPOSSIBLE to refund the season, or they just lied to me on Saturday, in order to shut me up. I hope it's the former and the not the latter. That way I get a reasonable cable bill for a month. But I must say I will be slightly shocked if it works out that we actually get our money back.

But not as shocked as I am to find out that cervical cancer is caused by a certain type of common virus. A virus! I didn't know that. Luckily this drug company found a treatment which made it fiscally advantageous to make a super annoying commercial to let everyone know, so they can get rich selling pills! Whew! Lucky us. Excuse me while I go tell someone.

Sorry, but that commercial is pervasive on Mommy TV (aka TV from 10am-4pm) and it drives me nuts. Like it's some sort of PSA...we aren't IDIOTS...

So I am annoyed by commercials again. This usually signals a change in hormone levels. Could this be it!? Am I ready? Hell No I'm not ready! Last week I made a list of crap to do. Probably has 20 things on it. This morning I looked at it and I've done 2. 2! And this morning I had a doctor's appointment and was happy to know I could get something crossed off...pre-register for the hospital...but they were out of the forms. Crap.

And I've been having contractions. Not just the tight Braxton Hicks kind, but the painful, ugh, ow, kind. They like to come at 3 in the morning or so. I have 2 or 3 of them about 15 minutes apart, and then they go away. Fun. Each time I'm convinced this is the beginning of something...which of course it is, it's just that the end is still 3 weeks away...I think.

Baby Boy is still without a name. You may have noticed the name Fredward being tossed around. Don't worry, we are not naming our son Fredward. J's sister Amy came up with that as a combination of my Dad's name FRED and J's dad EDWARD...so it's been kind of a place holder. We have a list of 7 names. I think we'll just go to the hospital with it and pick then. And NO I'm not telling you what they are. At least I don't think so. If I do, I may have to come up with ground rules for feedback...like you can't tell me which ones you DON'T like, just the ones you really like. I don't want any negativity, because I like them all. Hmm...I'll think on it.

Off to go get some nursing pads and try and guess how big my boobs will be once my milk comes in and buy a bra or two.

We are a sorry sight. If my whining and complaining about the discomfort of baby belly weren't enough, J tweeked his back. So we both spent Sunday on the couch wincing and groaning.

This weekend was supposed to be the final nursery furniture building weekend, but due to Js injury it only seemed appropriate to put it off another week. His back was compromised during the moving of the carpet for the nursery, so a little bit is done. Though now the door won't close. Bah. I know "readying the nursery" is supposed to be fun and something a new mama looks forward to, but I'm having trouble getting motivated. Maybe it's because there are so many stairs between the nursery and the couch? I'm counting on a surge of nesting instinct to push me through.

Today I bought my binsi skirt! I've talked to a few mama's who didn't like the hospital gown experience (makes you feel like you're sick and it bunches up, not to mention leaves your butt hanging out) and have heard some nice things about this little outfit. Hopefully it will be comfortable. I'll give a review once I'm done!

So besides building of furniture, what is to be done? Well, I think I finally got all the gear I needed. I found a used Arms Reach at Once Upon a Child for the next to the bed. I have diaper stuff, got the newborn disposables as well. Now besides putting everything away once the furniture is built, I need to figure out how all this stuff works! Breast pump, bouncey seat, car seat, stroller, sling....so much! Right now, my stuffed Hokie Bird has been the stunt double for Fredward. His tail makes him less than ideal for diaper practice. I would take a picture, but my battery is dead.

Tonight is our last birth class. Crazy. That means we're close. It's a potluck, so I need to get cookin'! I'm just going to make cous cous, since I'm not sure if anyone is vegetarian. Most likely, somebody is. I hope we exchange email/phone numbers with some people. It hasn't been a real social group. Mostly just gettin' down to business. But there are a few nice couples that it would be cool to touch base with, since we're all going through the same things. I also wanted to start a mama trivia team...since J and I's trivia DOMINATION (we won 3 rounds last week!) will have to end once the little guy shows up. Figured the ladies can go out and leave the babes at home for an evening. Hmm...I'll have to come up with a good team name.

Daddy's Turn
Pump before the Pints

...help me out!

Nobody puts Tubby in the corner

"And the room has 2 double beds?" inquires Mrs. Coldwater Creek as she twists her string of pearls with french manicured fingers.

"No, um, 2 twin beds" Sara behind the front desk says with some concern. She has been checking in wedding guests all afternoon and this Long Island and Connecticut country club crowd seem impossible to please. " We do have a room with a Queen if you'd prefer."

"The girl on the phone said we would have two double beds," Coldwater whines giving her husband, Mr. LL Bean a sideways look.

"I apologize, but we have no rooms with two double beds available."

"So you gave it to someone else," she huffs. "Just perfect."

"Ma'am, we don't have any rooms with two double beds."

"Yes, I see." She snaps.

"No ma'am, I mean none of our rooms have two double beds...we don't offer that particular arrangement."

"Oh, well" the woman was clearly not expecting this particular scenario. "The twins will be fine then."

I had the inkling she was caught trying a little scam...reserve a room and then complain that you actually requested different accomodations, hoping to get bumped up free of charge. Not sure why, she looked like money wouldn't be an issue. But I would also assume a married couple would prefer to sleep in the same bed, so what do I know.

Well, after another delay of someone running up to the desk (even though pregnant lady is clearly next! HELLO?!) to complain about the lack of TV in her room I finally check in. I was a little wary. This crowd seemed awfully hoity-toity to me. I wasn't super comfortable and felt kinda out of place. Not that we were going to the wedding or had to hang out with them, it was just an atmosphere kinda thing. I looked around and saw the staff and suddenly felt like Baby from Dirty Dancing and was wondering where all the guys and gals carrying luggage and opening doors were hanging out later.

This resort was definitely from another era. The Dirty Dancing comparison isn't that far off. I'm sure it had its hayday in the 50's with New York socialites and industrial barons.


But this weekend it was J, me and Tubbs! Yep, even though it was kinda upscale, dogs were everywhere. Gotta love a place that lets the whole family come along. And we had a ball. It really wasn't as fancy as it first felt. Our little cottage was cute, complete with wood fireplace that smoked too much and no TV. That was probably the scariest part...sitting there realizing we were stuck for 3 nights with no TV. But of course, it was a blessing in disguise. It slowed us down and allowed us to just be. Everywhere you went, there's a place to sit and something pretty to look at.







Not a ton to do, but we kept busy playing dominos, eating and walking around. If it were summer and I wasn't a weeble-wobble we could have swam, kayaked, drank from an insanely long wine list and taken a cocktail cruise. They have a pretty extensive kids program which seemed cool, so we're thinking of maybe making a trip back in the future, though I don't think we could afford it in the high season.

I took a ton of pictures.

The first night, there was an amazing sunset...


The second night it got a little stormy, which made for a pretty cool sunset too...


Part of our room deal included golf, so I tagged along with J while he hit the links.



And of course, since it's Autumn in New England, the foliage was beautiful.




All in all, it was incredibly relaxing.

J and I got some quality alone time, probably the last of that for a while. We got to just enjoy each other and think about what big changes are on the horizon. And everyone got to catch up on some sleep...

5 years and counting....

Yesterday, J and I celebrated our 5 year anniversary. It's hard to believe our wedding was that long ago. I know it sounds cliche, but it really was magical. It was the perfect night, perfect place,the perfect people and the perfect man. I am blessed to have found J and can't wait to see where this journey leads.

(insert nice picture of J and I dancing at our wedding....what the hell is up with blogger? Man.)

So last night we had a nice dinner out and then enjoyed the disappointing embarrassment of watching the Hokies. The second half I watched alone, in the bedroom, because J refused to expose himself to the shame any longer. I kinda wish I had turned the channel too, but I always try and have faith...you never know what can happen. This loyalty was rewarded with defensive breakdowns, punk move personal fouls and displays of apathy as a Hokie uniform gets a little boogie time in to Sweet Caroline. The worst was listening to Herbie. He's always been a supporter of our program, but last night he couldn't help but point out our lack of class and professionalism, not to mention our inability to play good football. Beamer needs to get a handle on these knuckle heads.

Ok, enough of that.

Today J and I are heading out to a little resort just south of here. We got a little cabin by the lake and are spending the weekend there to continue the anniversary celebration and have a "babymoon" of sorts. This will probably be our last hoorah before the little guy shows up! It's getting crazy close. I sorta wish we had done this a month ago when I was a little more mobile and comfortable. But better late than never.

We had the tour of the hospital on Monday. The birthing rooms are really nice. The only thing I don't like is that once the baby is born, they move you down to the materinity ward which seemed a little ghetto in comparison. We're trying to figure out what we can bring to make it a little more homey and comfortable. First thing is a lamp, because they have some bad flourscent lighting in there....and maybe a nice quilt or blanket. Too bad they won't let you just stay upstairs in the fancy place.

We got to see two little babies in the nursery while we were there. It was the perfect cure for the anxiety inducing "instrument" introduction we had just recieved. Nothing like a sweet pink little bundle to get the vision of forceps out of your mind.

Have a wonderful weekend!

"If it starts, we won't stop it"

That is what they told me last week since I've made it past the 34 week mark. Makes it all a little more real and not so far away anymore. I am feeling a little unprepared. I need to kick it into gear. I need to go shopping! God, I wish we had a Target.

Believe me, I already have plenty of baby crap. With pregnancy comes a whole world of products aimed specifically at you and your growing belly. But the most common in my home are the books, not exactly helpful in the day to day poop and pee fest of infants. Though they do help determine what is needed. Oh, don't get me wrong, I haven't read them. Or at least not all the way through. I can't seem to walk into Borders without feeling obligated to expand my pregnancy knowledge with the purchase of some sort of literature. But of course, since I don't actually read them, it doesn't expand much...perhaps shrink my wallet is a more accurate description.

Nevertheless, these books do get browsed. Usually this is for one of two reasons:

Something weird is going on. Either I feel funny, look funny or I don't feel or look funny enough. That's when these books get scooped up and I pour over the index looking for things like "shooting leg pain" (thank you baby, for putting your head on my sciatic nerve) and of course, "shingles."

Bathroom. Which as a pregnant woman you are in quite a bit.

Now all these books, as well as TV, other women, and even the doctors speak of the magical 2nd trimester period when you glow and feel wonderful. I admit I long for the previous lightness, dexterity and good humor I experienced in my second trimester. However, I don't think there was anything fabulously different or particularly noteworthy about it. I think it's just the last time you remember feeling normal and able-bodied. Therefore, you develop a sentimental and nostalgic attachment to it. I know I have. Sometime within the last few weeks, my body turned from a round-but-cute tub of baby, into a large, protruding incubator that I can't manuever out of a car without a groan, and can't make comfortable to sleep without a "nest."

The sleep issue has been mitigated by the introduction of the Snoogle! I love my Snoogle. My little nest would not work with out it. 5 pillows and 1 snoogle make an almost comfortable nights sleep.

I have been reassured that this is all for a good reason. The discomfort makes you more appreciative of labor and the end of pregnancy. Perhaps this is all a blessing since last week was "movie night" at birthing class, which didn't exactly make me excited about what is to come. I can't wait to meet the little man, but after the film it seemed a little more intimidating to say the least. Once they turned the lights back on, J turned to me and said "How ya feeling?" with a note of concern. He then added "Boy, I'm glad I don't have to do that." I smiled. Yeah, I kinda wish I didn't have to do that either.

But then I think about all I get that he misses out on. At night (when I'm not sleeping) I lie with hand on my belly and the little guy squirms and pushes up on on me. Part of me wants to nudge J, wake him up, so he can feel it too. I suppose I feel slightly guilty that only I get these constant reminders that he's there throughout the day...little hellos. I've known our son for months now, J has known a belly that gives an occasional jump and start. I am the one that is providing nutrients and life to the little one inside me, and will continue to provide all he needs once he joins us. I am amazed at what my body does, just as a matter of what it is and how it's set up. I don't have to make it do anything, it just knows. It's really mind blowing.

Tonight we have our birth class again. It's the night we visit the hospital. They're going to show us where to check in and give a little tour. I'm excited to see the new birthing wing. Apparently it's really beautiful, with lake views and tubs in every room. It should be funny to see 8 women who are all around 7 months pregnant being paraded around the hospital. I hope they have convienently appointed bathrooms.

Bring on the Poop!

Since I won't be contributing to the household income once baby arrives, I've been trying to become a 'home economist' and figure out ways to save money. One of the first decisions I made was to use cloth diapers. I just ordered my first little stash of stuff and it seems silly, but I can't wait for it to get here! Yes, I am excited about pieces of material designated to contain my son's poop.

It's mostly the prefold diapers and closures like diaper pins and Snappis. Snappies? Well, I am very curious to get my hands on these things. In doing my research, I 've come across them often and I'm still not quite sure how they work, so I only ordered 2, in case they are too advanced for my fumbling, inexperienced mama fingers. Anyway, he only wears one diaper at a time, right?

And in true new mama form, I also ordered a few of the fancy fitted and even a couple All-In-Ones. It doesn't make sense for me to order a bunch of these since they cost so much...I might as well use disposables. But I figured it would be nice to have some cute ones for going out and visits from Grandma. And they are just too cute to pass up. So with the little arsenal I already have, thanks to my fabulous SIL Amy, and the new stuff, I should be all set for a while. Hopefully by the time it comes to restock or go up any sizes I will have my preferred system down. Who knew there would be so many options? Pocket Diapers, inserts, fitted, flat, prefold, covers...I still don't know what will work best for us.

Now, with all that said, I am now declaring that I do not committ or promise that I will stick with this cloth diaper plan. I hope so, but if it's too much, disposables here I come. I can't imagine it will be that tough, but you never know. And I don't plan to cloth exclusively, there will be disposables mixed in, especially at the beginning. I understand the poop frequency and consistancy in the first few days is best handled with disposables.

So now there will be lots of wash to do. Not just once babe shows up and starts pooping, but before hand. The new prefolds need to be washed 3-4 times before they become fully absorbant. So, if your looking for me, I'm in he basment, doing laundry!

Go Team Fredward!

I got home today and read my post from this morning. I'm pretty sure that was my most poorly written post to date. I should proofread before I hit publish. Bah.

So this is a quick one, mostly to get that one to bump on down. Again, I am kinda on my way out. It is trivia night at RiRa. J and I go every week and are joined by a varying assortment of his coworkers. Last week we did the best yet, and tied for 4th! Not too shabby for a team of 4 up against think-tanks of 15. They really shoud put a limit on team membership...you get enough people together and someone will know the answer to any question. Hence, the same team wins every week.

They are called the Pithy Quips. How droll ( is that how you spell that? come to think of if it, is it Quips or Quipts? hm, I guess they are smarter than us...or at least better spellers). Anyway, they have a super annoying guy who always wears a suit and tie. I'm sure it's because he comes from work, but that doesn't make him any less of a douchbag. He is always the one who goes up for tie breakers and acts like an ass. So this week, we were thinking of signing up a fake team called "Lame Tie Guy." That way, when the first round answers are due, the MC will get on the mic and say "Lame Tie Guy, I need your answers...still waiting for answers from Lame Tie Guy."

It would be a hoot.

And Tubbs is next to me and just farted. Loud. I swear he did, really loud.
I love how he always looks at his butt afterwards like he's concerned.

Back from the Bank

I recieved the following letter from ESPN Customer Service in response to the ESPN Gameplan issue

Thanks for writing.

Um, you're welcome?

All games offered on ESPN GamePlan are available to all cable systems and satellite providers nationwide, with the exception of games being televised by the local ABC affiliate or other local over-the-air station.

No shit. It is not a lack of understanding the the blackout concept that is at issue here.

ESPN did not designate your market area as a blackout territory for Duke vs. Virginia Tech on Sept. 16.

NO SHIT! It is the fact that it wasn't shown even though "ESPN did not designate your market area as a blockout territory for Duke vs. Virginia Tech on Sept.16" that is the problem. So, what are we going to do now?

For billing related disputes, you do need to contact your local cable company.

Ok, now I know you didn't even read my email....I DID! THAT IS THE PROBLEM! They said it was your issue.

Further information for ESPN GamePlan can be found on the ESPN Pay-Per-View website (www.espnppv.com) or you can e-mail espnppv@espn.com.

Uh, yeah. I'll head over there the next time I need inaccurate information on what games are going to be shown on the Gampeplan costing me over $100, which I agreed to under FALSE PRETENSES.

Sincerely,
ESPN Viewer Response Team

You guys are worthless.

They probably would have done better to just not respond at all. Perhaps they are trying to give me ammunition against Adelphia by saying THEY are the ones who blacked it out? I don't know. Frankly, after the results of the Hokies weekend, I don't care as much.

Luckily I didn't have to watch it...well, not all of it. I was busy trailing J around from beer line to beer line at the big company throwdown. Yeah, tons of fun for someone 7 months pregnant. Robert Randolph and the Familiy Band played! And I couldn't even go in the basement to listen because baby got freaked out by the bass. He wasn't diggin' the vibes...or perhaps totally diggin' the vibes. Either way, he was trying to bounce out of my belly button, so I took it as my que to leave.

Oh, a party like that would have been so much fun a year ago. I had a good time, but it just wasn't the same. I feel a little guilty and selfish allowing it to depress me. Well, next year we hope to get the grandparents up for the weekend to babysit so mama can partake in some of the free wine.

Hopefully I'll be around a little more. I'm about to head out the door, I have a couple days of work at J's office, then I'll really be done. There is a lot to write about! I have assembled all my diaper crap. Started birthing classes. Can't see my feet and have some gripes about the Thursday night TV line up and other self-indulgent mindless crap!

I'm BLUE Dammit!

First I want to say, Yay Hokies!

Secondly, I would like to say, BOO ADELPHIA!

Or perhaps, BOO ESPN since they seem to be in disagreement about who is to blame for our lack of Hokie watching on Saturday. I swear there is some sort of curse attached to us and ESPN Gameplan…it never seems to work out. Some of you might remember what happened last year for the Georgia Tech game. Well, in the same fashion, J and I were left, munchies in hand, with no Hokies in sight.

How is this Adelphia/ESPNs fault? Allow me share.

First, like a responsible sports fan, I checked the internet to be sure it was “AVAILABLE IN MY AREA” which is what the issue was last year. This is what I saw.
I have helped those who might not know where I live by highlighting it with the red circle. BLUE, right? In fact, my circle obscures it, but the entire state of Vermont is blue.

I call Adelphia, and after 20 minutes of them trying to get their computers to work, and making sure it was football and not NASCAR I wanted, she said I was all set. Since it took so long we decide to go ahead and get the whole season, so everytime Vermont decides the other VT isn’t important, I don’t have to go through that phone call again. A whopping $125! But worth it for my Hokies.

So we get ready, gather snacks, adorn ourselves in maroon and orange and tune to channel 502... and wait. 11:58. Ok 2 more minutes. 12:00. Blank screen. 12:05. Ok, I’m getting worried. I check the other Gameplan stations and they are all good, except for the BC game. I check the blackout map. Sure enought, it says it's blacked out because it’s on ESPN2…I go to ESPN2 and there is BC. Ok, so the only other Gameplan station displaying the scary dark screen, like the one Tech is supposed to be on, is for a game that is blacked out. This can't be good.

So I call. I explain that we live in the BLUE, not the BLACK, yet there are no Hokies. Where are the Hokies? I’m not sure she really understood the concept of a blackout, but she wanted to help. She took my word for it that we SHOULD be seeing the game, so she had us do a few unplug this and turn that off
things to get our cable box to reset. But nothing. No Hokies. Then she checks a list, and the list says the game is blacked out in our area.

Though this is completely contradictory to the visual indicators given on the internet, I must admit defeat. Disappointed, I solemnly asked for a refund.

To this she said, NO. No refund. "We do not give refunds for Gameplan."

EXCUSE ME!? Um, I just paid $125 to watch a game that is not on my TV!! Either give me my Hokies or give me my money! She still refused. So J got on the phone.

He didn’t get much further, so he asked to speak to a supervisor.

Cable lady: It appears that game is blacked out in your area.

J: Not according to the map.

Cable lady: That is ESPNs map.

J: Yes, and we ordered ESPN Gameplan.

Cable lady: We cannot be held responsible for the accuracy of ESPNs map.

This went back and forth for a while. I don't feel like going over all the reasonable and well articulated points J asserted, but I glowed with adoration of his firm yet professional tone and his ability to keep from using expletives. In the end, they gave us the day for free. I actually did watch the Ohio State game for a while, and a few others, so I guess that was ok. Hopefully Gameplan will come in useful in the future. If not for Hokie games directly, perhaps for important ACC implications or ranking effecting games. God, I'm annoyed just by typing this. END TOPIC!

Oh, and we built the crib! It's very pretty. Perhaps building a complicated, instruction intense piece of furniture was not the best idea after the mood altering Aldephia experience. But we got through it. J only called it a "Piece of Crap" twice!

Bumpin the bump

Oh Saturday! Day of Football and today, of painting furniture. We found out last night that the VT game will be on Gameplan, and I think that's available on our Adelphia cable, so we should be able to root for the Hokies! Last year we had some complications because we had Comcast cable, and they pretty much were worthless. If I remember correctly it was Adelphia we had in Blacksburg. So...that means something, right? Ok, completely unrelated, but I gotta hitch my hope on something. I'm making The Phone Call in a few minutes.

I am counting the days down to when I won't have to work anymore (that would be 13). And more importantly, won't have to listen to Top 40 radio anymore. The girl in the cubicle behind me listens to Z100.5 or W98 or The Jam or whatever ALL DAY. At first, it's not so bad, it's nice to have a little music to distract you from the fact that you are doing the same thing over and over and over again. But then you realize the music is in the same rut. It's the same shit over and over and over. If I never hear that Frey song again....well, you get the idea.

I know these songs backwards and forwards by now. Well, sorta. See, she listens to it at a ridiculously low volume as to not bother anybody. Therefore, I can't quite make it all out. I mostly just get the bass and cymbals, and perhaps a lyric here or there...but usually just the chorus. Therefore, my brain fills in the gaps. It took me a week to find out that one of the songs they play constantly is actually by cutie patooty Justin Timberlake. I thought it was a chick. I saw the video yesterday morning and relized that high whiny voice was him. Oh Justin, loose the effects...you sound like Brittany. I've also made up my own words. I now know the name of the song is Sexy Back, but I can't tell you if or when anyone actually says that at some point in the song. I've been saying "come on, here we go" during that repetative part...doesn't say much for my imagination. Even when my brain gets a chance to fill in the blanks, it's boring.

Did I just write that much about a Justin Timberlake song? help.

Well, fall is upon us here in Northern Vermont. The maple trees outside our house are speckeled in yellow, though still mostly green. I would say in about 2 weeks it should be really pretty around here. I should celebrate my liberation from the cubicle by taking a nice long drive out into the mountains for a photo taking expedition! Only problem is my bladder won't really cooperate. I think 3 hours is it's limit...if I'm lucky.

Baby boy is squirmy. In a kind alien sort of way. He's stopped kicking and has begun a pushing and stretching, which is sorta freaky. But neat! But bizarre. He's probably poking at me to protest the impacts he's been feeling lately. Don't worry, not hard ones, but he is protruding much more and therefore, gets in the way. In the last two weeks he has been bumped by the bathroom stall door about 6 times. Oh, and the counter...I walk up to it, not realizing where my belly actually extends to and bump! oops. sorry little man. The most embarassing is standing up at my desk an not being aware half of my stomach is still under ergonomic keyboard holder. That one makes some noise. Which illicits questions of concerns from fellow cubby dwellers. No, I'm ok, I'm just bashing my baby into furniture.

Hope everyone has a great weekend. Go Hokies!

Oh my little blog, how I've missed writing to you. Especially during this time of change...I want things to be recorded so I can go back and read about what I thought and was going through. But work has been wearing me out and throw my folks visit on top, I haven't been feeling up to it. But, I dropped my mom off at the airport a little while ago and I am alone again. Just me, Tubbs and the little squirmy guy.

We had a really nice visit. My dad stayed through Tuesday, and my mom stayed on until today. We successfully bought a crib (which is waiting for J to go pick up) and some storage pieces for the nursery. My mother's grandama enthusiasm was channeled into 2 days of painting, so the nursery is nice and clean. I feel a little better knowing some things are done and out of the way. I still have a lot on the list, but most of the essentials are now covered. Just waiting for this work assignment to end so I can concentrate all my energy into preparations!

It's been so long, I'm sure there are things to talk about, but I can't seem to conjure anything up. I went to the Champlain Valley Fair. Eh. I pet a goat, looked at some bad art and ate the required blob of Fried Dough. Luckily we got out of there before Kenny Chesney appeared. Oh, we took a lunch cruise on the lake, which was nice. The weather wasn't perfect, but luckily it wasn't raining. My folks got a chance to see some of the pretty scenery around here.

God, this is boring. I know more interesting things are going on, but it's not on the tip of my brain. Well, I guess I'll be back to my Miami Ink Marathon. I have the remote set between that and the Supernanny Marathon. I struggle between the desire to watch people make permanent (and sometimes questionable) changes to their bodies and the proper implementation of a Naughty Mat. But first I must post at the Knitting Blog I have been neglecting...but only as much as my knitting. Oh, knitting, another reason why working sucks. Especially when you can't wear jeans, but can only wear flip-flops because your feet are so swollen you can't fit into your shoes. VERY PROFESSIONAL. And when you drop your pencil, you have to stand up and bend over to pick it up, because sitting and bending in no longer an option, unless you want to pop your baby.

Oh, I am officialy HUGE. I had a doctors appointment on Tuesday and after measuring me she goes "Well, looks like we've had a little growth spurt!" At least it was in reference to my stomach, so maybe that 6 pounds I gained between visits isn't all on my ass like I thought. I am bumping into things more and I can no longer carry my laundry down the stairs. Well, maybe on my head, but if I carry it in front of me, the weight of the basket plus the weight of my protruding belly makes my center of gravity so far in front of me that I danger of tipping over. J will now have to be laundry carrying man. He'll be so excited when he gets back from San Diego.

Computers are (apparently) used for more than blogging...

I've become increasingly crabby lately. J can tell you. He's probably counting his blessings he won't be around next week while my Mom and I attempt to ready the nursery. 'Cause if I'm crabby now, just you wait until I've spent 4 days straight with Grandma.

My folks were supposed to arrive tonight, but with concerns of being blown off the runway by Ernesto, they changed their flight to tomorrow. That way, they can fly over Ernesto and land in Burlington just in time for him to arrive here! It sucks they may not get to really see the beauty of the place...when it gets grey and rainy the mountains are obscured and the lake looks much less inviting. But my mom is staying a whole week, so hopefully we'll get out and she'll get to appreciate my new town like I do.

I haven't been around much...here, on the internet that is. I started my new job, which is going pretty well, but a sucky condition of it is that I'm not allowed on the internet...EVER. I think I might have mentioned this in a previous post...I'm not sure. I wouldn't know since I'm not allowed to come here, or anywhere. Really, it's killing me. Don't email me, unless you don't mind waiting a month for a response. Oh, and another thing! I can't wear jeans to work! Which normally would be ok, but since I have a very limited wardrobe, it's kinda a problem. Especially since the number of pants that fit seems to be dwindling by the week. Right now I have 3 pairs. But this will soon be 2. I might just wear my maternity jeans anyway and see if anyone says anything. Hey, I'm a temp, I don't drink your no-internet-surfing-no-jeans-but-fugly-Goucho-pants-are-ok-cubby-dwelling- Kool Aid!

Hopefully I won't go the remaining 4 weeks I have at the bank without posting, but I usually get my blog itch around 11am and I can't scratch it there...and I'm tired and numb when I get home.

So if I don't come around for a little, don't worry, I'm just busy processing Overdraft Protection Forms!

Dammit...I mean, Congrats!

This was another attempt at a post...and I expressed all my joyful wishes and thoughts about how far we've all come and funny stories about Bumperstickers, Nutty Russians on Crack, and people pretending to be asleep on couches so a girl can go meet her destiny...

I. am. So. Pissed.

I was loading pics and it was working fine. Then BAM! all gone.This picture appears to be the culprit...



That me and Jodi, Matt's lovely bride, sticking swords in our noses. When I try to load it, it goes, but manages to erase the rest of my post. And it's gone. Poof. Forever. You would think I would have saved it first, but NO, I'm an idiot.

And I am spent. I can't do it again. I feel horrible, but I'm worn out

But quick, because it's important....

Matt is awesome.

I'm glad J and Matt are friends.

I'm more glad that when I would find them locked in a parked car together after pulling a disappearing act at parties, they were only listening to music

and still fully clothed.


Jodi is awesome.

I'm glad Matt found her.

How often do find a girl willing to stick a sword up her nose?

I couldn't be more happy for both of them and their pack of black dog children.

I wish I was there to hug you.

J is there, so he better represent.

I wish you guys all the happiness and laughter the world can offer. I'm thrilled for you! I love you guys.



Yay Jodi and Matt!

Blogger Photo Upload sucks my butt

I just wrote a nice long post about Matt and it got eaten by Blogger and I am so pissed right now I don't even know what to do.

It was titled "Black Dogs Unite" because they have so many black dogs...see, good, right? Well, it was kinda sappy. "Matt's so great"...blah, blah, blah. Not that you aren't great, Matt! Because, you know you are.

Mostly it was about how J and Matt would be the ones getting married if one of them didn't have a penis. But luckily for me and Jodi they both do.

In the meantime...J and Matt and Jodi are all hanging out in Oregon together and I'm sure they are having a wonderful time. I admit I am jealous. Jealous but completely elated for them. It's going to be such a beautiful wedding and a rockin' party. Even without the sockmonster...

Now just waiting for Heff to call...

I just finished dinner. I had mashed potatoes. That's it. Not very healthy I know, but with it, I had a side of prenatal vitamin, so it's ok.

This is what happens when you cook for one. J is in Portland for a little over a week and I am left to my Lean Cusines and cereal...and of course, Instant mashed potatoes,yum! J is in Oregon, first on business, and second because our friend Matt is getting married. Hi Matt! (He sometimes comes here, though he's probably too busy this week to bother, or at least he should be...hey Matt, don't let the lady do all the work! Get off the internet and go pick up some relatives at the airport or something. But then check in later this week because I will be dedicating a post to you and your lovely lady, Jodi.)

I'm not there because I'm HUGE and pregnant. Also, wedding cake may send me spiraling into a coma. I failed my gestational diabetes test. Just the first one. I took another test on Friday, which I will find the results of tomorrow. Oh, I should totally take a picture of my arms, I look like a heroine addict. By the way, what's worse than sitting in a plane of recycled air for and hour and a half after the doctor has informed you that you have a "comprimised immune system?" How 'bout the Laboratory Waiting Room at the Hospital for 3 hours whilst a girl about the age of 19 continually pokes holes in your arms and drains you of fluid. At least on a plane you can bet the vast majority of the people are healthy, but the hospital? Nope, all sickies. I should have saved my Airborne for that. Oh well, so far so good.

This is a little embarassing and seems very self-important and vain. But if this blog isn't the epitome of self-importance, I'm not sure what is... After repeated requests of a picture of my ginormous belly, I finally took one..or 68. I set up the tripod today because I want to take a picture to give to J when he is off in San Diego at the beach with his 23 year old coworkers. Just so he remembers the Tub of Love he's got waiting for him at home.

Here's just the belly

Here's the artsy black and white version

Now here's one with my head in it

again, b&W version


I took a gazillion pictures on timer and these are the only ones that don't show me with at least 3 chins. I photoshoped that belly shot a little in the b&W...perhaps I should redo it. I put a spotlight on the belly, but instead of making it look serene or magical, it just looks shiny. Hm, shiny bellies are sexy, no?

Consider me showered. In a downpour of blue fuzzy stuff.

Billy: Hi, this is Billy from Dumbass Delivery Service. Wanted to let you know I dropped off your luggage from United this morning.

Me: Um, where? At a neighbors?

Billy: No, on your front porch.

Me: On my front porch? That's practically on the street. I live downtown. Like, RIGHT downtown. What if someone swipes it?

Billy: Your not being very optimistic.

Me: Oh, I'm optimistic. Optimistic that the only clothing I own that actually fits my big, bloated, pregnant body is now walking down Maple street along with all the Thank You cards that Mrs. T was nice enough to pre-address and stamp...and not to mention all those baby sweaters I knitted. Are you some kind of fucking idiot?!

(Ok, I didn't say that, but that's what I was thinking. But he did actually say that I "wasn't being optimistic.)

Me (really): Do you normally just leave peoples stuff on their porch?

Billy: Don't worry, I cleared it with my supervisor.

He responded to additional inquiries regarding a course of action should my stuff get stolen with "I don't know what to tell you." Moron.

Luckily J was able to leave work, run home, and get my bag and put it in the house. Disaster averted, though I was thinking about how much money I might be able to get out of United. Especially if my leg should suddenly become inflammed and painful because I couldn't take my much needed antibiotics! Oh, they got lucky, very lucky.

OK...on to the less bitchy portions of my weekend.

I had a great shower. I must give credit to Mrs. T who planned the event with my mother, which couldn't have been an easy task. It was just what I wanted. Food, good people, booze for the unpregnant and, of course, lots of presents! I'm an not really a "shower person" and I had a wonderful time!

I found out the reason my mother was having, what seemed to me, and extrememly strong reaction the possibililty of me not coming, is that she flew in all her sisters as a surprise. The Aunts. Including my mom they make up a foresome of Midwestern, cassarole cookin', placemat crocheting, Mathew McCaughnehey loving ladies. They are scattered around the country, so it was a big deal for them all to be in one place at one time. The last time they were all together was J and my's wedding. So it was great to see them. Though it did require that I sit through the photo portfolio of my Aunt M's quilting projects...twice.

This kid is set for clothing for the next year. Though I may have to do a little shopping to balance out the utter preciousness of it all. I love the stuff I got, it's all just so....cute.** Don't get me wrong, I'm liking the cute. But my favorite thing about boy clothing is the "little man" outfits. You know, jeans, rugby shirts, suede elbow patches. It makes them look like shrunken adults. Right now he'll look like a shrunken mascot for the Perriwinkle Puppydogs or something that should be put in an easter basket.

**To anyone who reads this that sent me something that is not "cute" I...maybe I should just go through a quick list. Amy, the Frank Zappa shirt rocks. Diddy, the Vans! The kid is doing ollies as we speak. And Mrs. T...the Hokie garb was all I was hoping for. My friends are the coolest.