Thursday, November 03, 2005

If you wait until everything's perfect...blah, blah, blah

I should be ovulating in the next few days. I have my arsenal of pee sticks at the ready. I checked last night, and no dice – which means I won't be ovulating in the next 24 hours.

Thinking about the success or non-success of this month’s attempt, some timing issues have risen.

#1 THE WEDDING

J's best buddy M is getting married next August. At least that's what we've been told. No invitations out yet or anything, but we have it on good authority that next August will be it.

If we are successful this month, that will put us with a little one in August. And I mean LITTLE*. Not sure, but I don't think it's advisable to fly across country with a 2-week-old. Also, I'm sure the lack of sleep and the high probability that I will be totally freaking out will make it not so appealing. So if we get it done, I doubt I will be attending. J would have to go because he's a groomsman, and M is his spiritual equivalent of a twin brother. I'm a little disappointed because this wedding will be a blast. I am sure the moment J leaves I will explode into jealous fits and sobbing and oh so much pissyness.

However, it may not happen this month. But let's hope it happens within the next 3. If so, that would put me in my 3rd trimester at wedding time. Not only will I be HUGE** and uncomfortable, it is my understanding that you are not supposed to fly during this time. Something with the air pressure and the babies popping out unexpectedly…(?)

J and I talked about it and decided it will not deter our efforts. M does not know about the secret plan to keep me from his nuptials, but I'm sure he will agree it's worth it.

#2 UNBEARABLE ATMOSPHERIC CONDITIONS

Now, if I am to be due anywhere near the month of August, that means I will be at my most bloated, most uncomfortable during the most oppressive and humid time of year. I don’t think I need to say anymore…Ugh.

*is that the visual equivalent of an oxymoron?
**then i suppose this is redundant?

7 comments:

KidTaster said...

Okay, during this embarkment into prego/mamahood you will likely meet 2 kinds of people. The kind who will blow sunshine up your ass and tell you how endlessly wonderful motherhood is and the kind who want to tell you every horrible mothering experience they, their mom, their cousin Jean or that lady down the street has ever had. I am going to do my best to walk the line somewhere in the middle...

1. The jealous hissyfits? Yeah, they happen all the time. For the first long stretch You're it. Sometimes you'll get jealous and pissy because J will get to take a shower every day and pee without someone in his lap. Them's the breaks, mama. You'd probably have a jealous hissyfit at the wedding anyway, when J gets to drink and dance and be normal sized while you eat 12 pieces of cake and go to bed at 7:30. Maybe I'll just have to come meet the baby that weekend (unless I have a 2 week old and/or huge belly as well).

2. Sarong + XL men's white t-shirt = summer survival. When I was almost 200lbs in mid-July I would have killed someone without the sarongs. Or embrace your former hippy self and get some airy fairy twirly skirts. Seriously. I can find you some cute ones, I have lots of seamstress friends.

Good luck with the pee sticks! Mine was - Saturday as well...

K said...

It's funny because I'm already jealous in some sort of anticipation kind of way. I look at him and resent that he doesn't have to really change anything until a baby actually shows up. But I get to have this 9 month body altering experience. Not that I'm even sure what it is I will go through, but I know it will a lot harder that what HE has to do. He gets to keep on keeping on, life the same ol' same ol' while I crave my precious red wine, have nicotine withdrawl convulsions and get really fat.

Of course, there is something to be said about getting to be the one who actually grows the little one...I get to know them before he does. Perhaps he can be jealous of that! While he drinks his beer.

KidTaster said...

LOL. Yeah, you won't know until it happens, but there are perks. People hold doors open for you. You can eat as many eclairs as you want without getting funny looks. When the dishes need to be done, you can make J do them because you are busy 'growing the baby'. The smell of red wine will probably make you want to puke anyway. Okay, maybe that's not actually a perk...

You get to go to the midwife or OB and find out all the info on the little shrimp. You get to feel the kicks and somersault flutters. You get inducted into the really cool mama club, it's corny, but it's stronger than you think. And while sometimes you'll wish it weren't so, you'll always be the first line of defense. You'll always be the one the baby wants first, and everything will probably mean just a little bit more to you. Trust me, I've been up with a toddler with an ear infection since 2:30 am and it still makes me feel good that I'm the one that brings him comfort and makes him feel safe. Not that I wasn't jealous of Kyle sleeping away in his bed, but to be honest, I find it hard to sleep when little man isn't happy anyway.

K said...

Thanks mama, you ease my anxieties. And The Secret Society of M.O.M.M.Y. will be a welcome gang of girls to hang with.(i'll have to think of what that means - Moms of..um Mob of ...uh, need more M words. and there ain't too many Y words out there either. Hmmmm)

Poor kid, give the Bean a hug from his Aunt Kiki!

(TOTALLY kidding...TOTALLY. No Aunt Kiki...please)
:-)

Anonymous said...

Not so romantic when you're HUGE and about to pop! Just imagine the sweat...and the chaffing.. ugh! But I appreciate the sentiment. I'll try to look on the bright side. :-)

Hey there daddy! Thanks for the visit. keep up the blog..you crack me up!

Nacho

Anonymous said...

It's kinda funny, my dad said something along the same lines of the post title...

My son's baby book has a place in it where Daddy is supposed to write in what he said when he found out that Mommy was pregnant. I believe my response to that question was "Uh oh!" Both of mine are oops-es.

Good luck in your endeavour! Did I spell endeavour correctly?

Anonymous said...

Um, your spelling is right on as far as I know, I don't judge...I cannot spell - at all.

Since this post it's been a while, and no baby yet. Still trying though! A little Hokie would rock. (of course, he/she would rebell and probably want to go to UVA, or god forbid, FSU).