Tuesday, August 23, 2005

Please pass the...mustard

J and I are not fancy people. At least I never thought we were fancy or anything even close. However, today I was talking to someone at work. Words came out of my mouth and inwardly, I was somewhat horrified at what I sounded like.

"J left on business trip this morning. Business, sure, but I'm sure he'll spend most of the time on a golf course."

Ugh, he sounds like such a cliche. Not to mention, I sound like the bitchy wife - the golf widow or something. I shudder to think that we sound like....um...yuppies?

Perhaps "yuppie" isn't really it. Perhaps domesticated? Suburban? Middle class white folk? (though we neither live in the suburbs or are what I would call Middle Class...maybe LOWER middle class.) My life is my life, and I shouldn't care how we are perceived, but I can't help but feel we have, in some way, morphed into a more conservative, buttoned-up, Martha Stewart version of ourselves.

When did this happen?! Seriously. 7 years ago we were pot smoking, Phish touring, dredlock washing (yes, I washed them...though I didn't have a whole full head of the them. Just 6 in the back - I know,sounds nice, huh?) old crappy house renting, thrift store shopping, dumpster diving, hippie-types. I don't feel different. I suppose I look a little different, but not that much. I took the nose ring out and my hair, though still naturally messy, is no longer in knots. I pretty much lay off the herb now. Must admit it makes me paranoid. We finally bought a house.

You know what? I think that's what's done it. The house.

The house is such a HUGE responsibilty. It is the tangible respresentation of what meager wealth we have managed to string together. And, it's our future. We are living in our savings account. Our ACTUAL savings account is, well, let's just say it's no place you want to go. The tumble weeds and dust storms make it tough.

So, perhaps a house isn't enough to make you a Yuppie, or whatever. But there are other worrisome indications, I fear. Let me share:

We have a dog. A Chocolate Lab. Perhaps the Yuppiest dog on earth. I don't care. He is awesome.

J has a Jeep Cherokee. Kinda an old beater, so it's not as bad as those huge shiny SUVs all the soccer moms drive.

J would LOVE to have a huge shiny SUV.

We have Macs. Not PCs anywhere in sight. Windows - no way. Perhaps that's more of a Hipster kinda thing.

Tivo...I LOVE my Tivo.

I garden. And I like it. You should see my roses.

We went to Vermont for the weekend and saw some Summer Stock Theater ...nuff said.(see previous post)

As I mentioned before, J likes to hit little white balls across the countryside into a hole in the ground.

My mom, the wondful woman that she is, has offered me her old car when she gets her new one. It is a volvo station wagon. No joke. And you better believe I'm going to take it.

Perhaps we fit the mold, perhaps not. Perhaps the term Yuppie just means your not a kid anymore and are willing to take out your nose ring so you can get a job somewhere else besides a resteraunt or tattoo parlor. Perhaps it means we are sell outs to the material and corporate forces at work in America.

Maybe I've just realized that property values are more important than my neighbors rights to sit on their front porch and smoke cigarettes, let their lawn become a jungle of weeds and yell at their dog, so everyone in the freakin neightborhood can hear your redneck ass, every five seconds.

Ooops, that me.


Anonymous said...

Oh dear, Nacho. I read this post on THE DAY I closed escrow on my first house. It is all over for me, isn't it?

KL said...

Don't worry xt! And congrats! Please don't let me scare you...owning a home is great. When I rented I used to always lament that I couldn't tile the bathroom if I wanted...now I can. Not that I do, of course. But I can!!

Good Luck!!

Frazzled said...


I can totally relate to your latest entry!

My husband and I have been referred to as "yuppies" by someone before. It was hilarious because we are ANYTHING, but yuppies!

Far from it actually.

It is amazing to see your lives evolve and change.