Bustin' at the seams

Ok, this kid is getting evicted. Not only am I HUGE (I know. I've been saying that for 9 months now, but now it's really, really true) but I got my first stretch marks! Crap. I've been counting my genetic blessings that I've avoided them, and if this kid had a sense of timing I would have escaped them altogether. I'm trying to look at them as badges of honor, and though I'd be happy to have none,mothers have been gladly sacrificing their bodies since the beginning of time, so I should stop my whining. I've got it pretty good. They aren't on my belly (yet) but on my hips, where I already have some from puberty.

Doctor checked me yesterday...no change. Not dialated, not even a smidge. I have a NST on Friday were they check to make sure baby is chillin' ok, that his sense of timing is better than theirs. In the end, he knows best. I might let them do a membrane sweeep on Monday if something doesn't happen over the weekend. That's when they kinda poke at your amniotic sac to stimulate hormones and hopefully get the ball rolling a little...I know you're jealous, sounds like fun, huh?

So, is my November baby destined to be a December baby? We shall see!

J and I both have a weird feeling about Saturday.

First Notice: Past Due

Well, STILL pregnant. Baby Boy's due date has come and gone. Though the doctor told me 41-42 weeks is not unusual I must admit I was holding on to that day. I figured the little guy would be enjoying his first Hokie football game on the couch with us, but instead he got the usual muffled Daddy screams through my abdomen wall. Perhaps his first words won't be "Tubbs, shut up!" but "GLENNON! You idiot!" Of course it all turned out ok on Saturday. Since we couldn't have Baby, at least we got to retain the Commonwealth Cup! Yay Hokies!

Last night I had some contractions, but at this point I don't put a lot of stock in that. I know I'm getting closer, but to guess how close that may be seems futile. It will happen when it happens. Only it is getting awfully close to xmas! I would like to keep him a November Baby. For some reason that line between months offers some kind of mental buffer. Expenditures on presents is a worry...especially before the winter heating season in Vermont. Baby Bday + Xmas + Gas Bills = poor house.

So I'm just waiting. I'm a little annoyed that the pre-baby house cleaning and grocery store trip has faded in their effectiveness. The dog hair is accumulating and the fridge is becoming bare. Today I have a list of little tasks to complete. Maybe the activity will help move things along.

So until further notice, I am still cookin' the kid. Everyone send me some labor vibes!

Cookin'

So, no change. Same ol' situation. She told me I should start thinking about it being 41 weeks so I don't drive myself crazy. I don't WANT it to take 41 weeks! **whiny voice and stamping feet**

A 41 week baby MUST be bigger than a 40 week baby. And I don't want that if I can help it, considering where he has to squeeze through. And I know for sure a 41 week pregnant butt will be bigger, and my butt is as about as big as I can stand. Come on kid...get a move on!

However, if you are a superstitious type, perhaps he will come on Saturday. J's dad had a collegue call him from a casino and ask him if he wanted to place a bet. He said put $10 on 25 at the roulette table since it's Fredwards due date...and it hit! Woo hoo! Not exactly scientific, but a girl can hope.

So it's just the waiting game around here. Looks like it will just be the two of us for turkey day. We are not inundated with turkey as I had feared we might. J forgot to sign up for the free turkey at work, so it's just the one bird. Still alot for two people, but lord knows I won't feel like cooking much after the kid shows up so the leftovers will be a blessing. And I made 2 pies! A pumpkin pie (which is already half gone) and a cherry pie that is waiting for Thursday in the fridge, yum! Of course none of this is going to help my butt situation, but let's just hope breastfeeding goes really well and the kid will just suck the fat off of me? It can happen, so I've heard. I've also heard not to count on it.

But then, there's always this

Still here, still pregnant

I've been hiding out a bit around here. I'm not laying low just on the blog front, but my phone communications have been few and brief. I think it's because there is this big thing that will be happening and everything else just seems boring and not worth mentioning. Also, most of my recent experiences are best described with whining. And I don't want to whine too much. So to all my buds out there, sorry I haven't been in touch very often...soon I will have news. Very soon I hope.

Especially Mrs. T! I don't think I've mentioned it in a blog post, but Mrs. T is pregnant too!! She's going to be having a little girl in April and I am so excited we are going through this major life change at the same time. Though being a bit further ahead makes me feel a little remiss in my friend duties, as she deserves all the care and attention she blessed me with when it all began for me. Oh I can't wait for our kids to meet! I can imagine them great friends. That is until cootie age. Then they'll ignore each other, until about 13 or 14...then we'll HOPE they ignore each other.

Hey, Mrs. T! if you read this...I remember you asking about how to post a picture. What's the the story? Am I going to get to see a pic of this little girl or not?!

I can't let this blog post go without a little bit of a whine. I hurt. Every joint in my body hurts. I feel like I've been hit by a bus. The worst part is, I can do nothing. I just sit. I feel useless.

Ok, now on the upside! My turkey points didn't have to be used to buy a turkey! Figures since such a large portion of the population is vegetarian. It's just $20 off your bill. Yeah! So yesterday I got some pie fixins and stocked up on some other crap. During the process I realized I can no longer go to the store to shop. My pregnant "waddle" has turned into a pregnant "shuffle" since my joints hurt so much. I felt like I was using the shopping cart as a walker. I must have looked pretty pathetic...also REALLY pregnant. 3 people asked me when I was due...usually they don't. I think they were just trying to insure that my grimaces and groans weren't indications of labor. Ooops, I let that go back into the whining realm...sorry.

Oh, HAPPY BIRTHDAY AMY! Today is my SIL bday. Yeah! You know what would be a GREAT present? A NEPHEW! I'll see what I can do.

Know any good turkey recipes?

Yesterday was the big "before baby" shopping trip to the grocery store. It took 3 hours. Not 3 hours just in the store (thank god), but 3 hours to waddle in, waddle around and waddle out. A good portion of that was also unloading the car and putting everything away.

Then I took a 2 hour nap.

It's frustrating that things that used to be simple have become major endeavors. I suppose it's a primer for what is to come...they say to add an hour to every task when you have baby with you. At least then I'll have baby in a little carrier on the front of the cart instead of grinding his head into my cervix as I walk.

One of my goals with the shopping trip was to get a turkey! I've been collecting "Turkey Points" from our grocery receipts, but I didn't have enough for the trip yesterday. I decided I better get a turkey anyway, since I wasn't sure the next time I would be able to get to the store. And because I want to get that sucker cooked, carved and in the freezer before my water breaks. Well, of course my grocery bill was absurdly high with all the frozen and canned foods and low stress meals, and as a result I earned a ton of turkey points. Doing the math in my head I knew I was close, when added with my points at home, to get a free turkey. I toyed with the idea of returning the turkey I got and trying to redeem points another day. But then you have to account for the reduced grocery bill and perhaps the docking of points...and I started to get a head ache. I didn't want to deal, so I bought my Butterball. Well, I got home and we do indeed have enough points for a free turkey. So now we can have two turkeys! The one I already have isn't real big, and if baby comes before Thanksgiving, there's a good chance of alot of people being around, so another turkey isn't really a bad thing...

Then J came home last night and when poking around the fridge I hear "So you got a turkey?"

"Yeah, funny story" I reply.

"Well, I got an email at work...everyone gets a free turkey and a pie...so I guess we'll have a lot of turkey."

Um, you think?

I don't have enough room in our fridge for 3 turkeys. Especially when you take into account the stockpile of Lean Cuisine and Amy's Lasagna. I'm assuming there is a charity somewhere in town that will take one... or perhaps my MIL can use one at xmas?

Otherwise, it's turkey until Valentines Day in our house.

Taking a deep, cleansing bitch

I don't know if I've mentioned it before, but my landlord is having our house painted. Just the exterior, so it's not as intrusive as it could be. At first, it was bad, as they were scraping all the old paint off at 7AM every morning, but once they started the actual painting it got better. Just a little clattering of ladders now and then.

I don't know if it's my hormones, discomfort or the fact that it is TAKING THEM FOREVER, but lately, they are being HUGE pains in the ass. If I go out, I come back and they are parked in the driveway (we only have one spot). They make the dog bark. Ok, I can't really blame them for that...it's not like they're trying to make him bark, but Tubbs is driving me absolutely bonkers. As a result, baby is getting a steady stream of yelling, which is making me feel bad, and puts me in even a worse mood. Baby's first words will be "Tubbs, shut up!"

Now, the straw the broke the pregnant lady's back...

They are currently at lunch. This lunch is usually 2 hours long...I don't really care about that, they don't work for me. But what I DO care about is that they have left all their uncovered paint cans and brushes in Tubb's area. So he can't go outside. Of course I realize this as I'm walking him out to his chain, hunched over as I have him by the collar...and after he stepped on the newly painted threshold! Why would you paint a piece of wood that marks the entrance and exit of a house without telling the people inside?! Tubbs now has a green foot...and the threshold has a large paw print on it. I don't even want to get into how with my 8 month pregnant body I tried to coax the 90 pound dog away from his outside toilet shangri-la and back inside, without either of us stepping on the threshold again, and put his leash on so we can go to a non-paint can filled area to pee.

I think my neighbors have a new opinion of me, as I let the expletives fly. Wonder how many cute belly comments I'll get now.

And on our way in, I saw they are putting trash in my recycle bin!!! AAAAAArrrrrgghhh!

Tubbs is licking his foot. Great, now he'll be poisoned.